


Memories

by bofoddity



Category: Final Fantasy IX
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-18
Updated: 2014-05-18
Packaged: 2018-01-25 13:59:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1651127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bofoddity/pseuds/bofoddity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Collection of FFIX ficlets and a drabble. Old work.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Caution and Other Things

To claim that Kuja was something Hilda had never seen before was an understatement. She wasn't sure if he was anything that anyone had ever seen before, a strange creature who was as unpredictable as a nightmare. Hilda should have been afraid of him, or at least disgusted by him, the way he spoke of carnage in the same way than ordinary person would speak of music or a painting, awe and wonder in his voice.

She was his prisoner, after all, and she knew better than to trust his slick smiles and the low purr of his voice. If she were to outgrow her usefulness, he wouldn't think twice about getting rid of her, no matter how thoughtful he had been to her so far. Hilda knew all of that, and yet whenever he wished her good night by kissing her on the back of her hand, it was delight she trembled with when she felt his tongue touch to her skin.


	2. Going Home

It was summer, and Zidane was going home.

"This is your home," Baku in his head said, offended. "I fed you. I gave you a place to stay in." He looked down at the ground. "Sometimes I just needed your blankets for myself, all right?"

He fell silent with that, and Zidane laughed at the unreality of him. The real Baku had been dying to kick him out for a long time and never felt bad about stealing from anybody in Tantalus, but it was nice to dream. It was even nicer to dream of Dagger, how tight her arms would feel around his neck when he came home. The dreams kept him from thinking how she might not want him back.

Life goes on, went his motto, but he also had a heart. That heart didn't want Dagger to forget him.

It was summer and Zidane was scared, but his family was fed up with his fear; he would be heading for Alexandria whether he wanted or not. He would take the stage before his queen, and hope that she'd smile on when she saw his face.


	3. The Decent People

"I think it would do you good to get away from your work for a while."

Once, those words would have belonged to his nightmares. They hadn't sounded nightmarish anymore, but the knowing look in Zidane's eyes had kept that from being an empowering experience. Of course Zidane would have all sorts of ideas about what Steiner would be doing in his free time and Steiner had no doubt they involved him and Beatrix in compromising positions. He got even more annoyed when he started having those thoughts himself.

Yes, Zidane was sure to have a negative effect on Alexandria's long established culture, but Steiner and Beatrix were still proper people. So as soon as his time off began, Steiner found himself a new way to preserve order.

Guarding the shopping district was a very different duty from looking after the royals, but Steiner soon realized that it was no less important. One never knew when a low life would decide to break the now famous peace of his city, and the many shops he watched over were tempting targets for those with taste for money and foolish tourists. His presence would serve as a reminder that an ordinary citizen's safety mattered here. He made a note to make this a regular thing.

He would get around to getting in compromising positions with Beatrix, of course; he wasn't dead after all. But when it happened, it would happen on his own-

"Steiner!"

In the middle of a step, his leg halted in the mid-air and proceeded to menace his balance. He wavered for a moment before steadying himself, and listened to his heart thump at the sight of Beatrix.

She was wearing her usual uniform, but the way her smile beamed when she approached him made Steiner wonder how could ever have been a time when he wasn't stunned by her. But here he was, staring at her in awe until he became aware of a twinkle in her eye and got suspicious. "What is it?"

The skin he loved to kiss around her visible eye creased even more, making his doubt question itself. He didn't even mind her chuckling at him.

"My dear, I can finally join you on your holiday." Rustle of a paper bag almost failed to reach his ears when Beatrix lifted it to his vision. "I decided to celebrate by getting you a gift."

Holiday? Gift? For him? Duty didn't seem that interesting anymore. "You shouldn't have," he said, but his voice was high with delight. He pretended that didn't mismatch with the serious expression he was trying to hold.

Beatrix shrugged. "I disagreed." She stepped close to peck him on the nose, sending his second attempt of modesty bouncing away. Curses, she really had him in her grasp! "I'll see you later," she whispered, touching him briefly on the cheek before marching off.

Steiner stared after her before his legs felt solid enough move again, and that's when he allowed himself to beam a bit too. Beatrix. Holiday. Compromising positions. His head span faster with every thought and it took him a while for his sense to put a stop to that. He still had a patrol to finish and he hadn't memorized each of these shops to leave unfinished work behind. His pride was starting to swell over that when a realization came to him.

He was standing in the middle of a street. There was a weapons shop over there. Beatrix had come from over there. Somewhere he was being laughed at.

Face hotter than sun-warmed iron, Steiner stared at the word "Lingerie" on the store sign. Compromising positions indeed.


	4. Once a Thief

It's not easy to be a thief, and it's not easy to be a thief who has mouths to feed. Zidane learned that well as a child when Baku didn't always succeed in bringing enough food home, sometime failing to eat himself, sometime failing to feed any of them. Acting for real didn't always help either, so hunger is a familiar feeling to Zidane, and the one he always takes as a sign that things aren't as well as they should be. Even after hunger stopped being the norm. Even after it stopped being a threat altogether.

"If you want something to eat, just ask the servants," Dagger advices him gently after discovering the bread he has smuggled into their bed chambers from the dining room, and Zidane responds with an awkward smile. He doesn't think being the prince consort of Alexandria will ever stop being weird for him.

For a while, that really seems to be the case. He joins Dagger in her royal duties and keeps his eye instinctively out for things to slip into his pockets and other available places, and every once in a while a temptation slips through. He keeps bringing food to their bed chambers and picks the locks of the palace doors whenever he's bored. He keeps waiting for Dagger to notice, and is embarrassed when he finds out she's known all along.

"You must regret marrying me," he says upon the revelation, and lowers his head. He doesn't blame her for thinking so, but it feels bad nevertheless.

He hears her laugh, and jumps at the touch of her hands when she cups his face and tilts it up.

"Do you know what I did when I thought you were dead?" she asks him.

Had lots of lovers, Zidane wants to say, but he knows that it isn't true. Though he wouldn't have minded a bit; the idea of Dagger being lonely for the rest of life makes him sadder than any poets could describe. He shakes his head.

"I never wore my royal wardrobe or my crown. I carried my staff everywhere I went and kept preparing for Eidolon attacks. I thought about war all the time." The mirth on her face fades with every word, and Zidane reaches up to stroke her arms. Dagger smiles at that and continues: "Steiner and Beatrix weren't happy about it, but they didn't stop me either. Do you know why?"

"Because you'd get over it?" Zidane says, and nods as he gets it. He's puzzled when Dagger shakes her head.

"Because it was necessary for me." Dagger's thumbs brush along his cheeks in gentle strokes before settling on the bones, near his temples. "Because it gave me peace of mind and because they loved me. Do you understand?"

This time he does. He grins to her as he reaches out for her waist, pulling her near.

"So you love me? Thanks, a reminder is really handy."

She frowns at him. "What is that-?" she starts, but melts into a smile in the middle of the sentence, sliding her hands down to his neck as she pulls him closer. "Yes, I love you," she says, and pecks him lightly on the mouth. "I want you to be happy."

"I am happy," he replies, and turns the peck into a deeper kiss.

He keeps hoarding food for one month more before the need finally leaves, and he doesn't miss it at all.


	5. Acquittals

It's only after Garnet and her friends have gone when Hilda's husband asks her:

"Did he hurt you?"

Hilda looks past him, observing how his face becomes devastated in the edge of her vision. So Cid still loves her; his wanderings have made that hard to believe. She stretches his torment for a while before shaking her head.

"I'm relieved," Cid says, smiling. Hilda doesn't tell him she doesn't feel the same way.

Only after Kuja's death does she allow the relief to come, herself to enter her husband's rooms again. Her temptation is gone; absolution is no longer needed.


End file.
